Epic Fail on SH:SM

No, the title does NOT mean Sado-Maso. It means Silent Hill: Shattered Memories. What that means is a game that promises to be scary. What it delivers... is not quite such.

The game starts off with a psychological profile, something that I can really appreciate. Anyway, some people (Adam fucking Sessler) say that this makes the game worse, but I think that it's a nice little touch. IE: choosing the basic background of a sexually-repressed person (not my original choice, but I decided I wanted to see Freudian imagery) leads to a nice little mindfuck. It's not really going to just jump out at you and slap you in the mouth with it's cock, but it's going to sit there, waiting for you. I like it especially because, well, all the little details conform to you. Yes, yes, I know it would've been scarier to a sexually-repressed man to be chased down a giant birth canal by fanged, screaming cunts, but that would take... editing. Also, there's hardly any blood in this game, and that would also be messy. Probably.

The game is not really that scary, and some have derided the main enemies, which I personally found to be unnerving, but not outright scary, but an even bigger source of derision came from the fact that you can only be attacked when your screen goes blue and you know that you're in what my friend quickly dubbed "The Other Twilight Zone". Now, wait, I thought this was a fucking Silent Hill game?

Combat has been replaced with running away, which is good, considering this is a Wii game, but I always thought that the combat in SH was part of what made it great: desperate flailing away at a vastly-superior force felt SCARY.

They got rid of that hooded cunt, which is good. They took out monsters, which is bad. They took out combat, which is both good and bad. They have a psych profile, but don't utilize it to it's fullest potential, which is bad. The monsters aren't SH2 caliber, which is bad (and impossible, so I'll let that one go).

In short, good, ambitious attempt, but it falls short.

6/10

Stay tuned, I'm gonna do Red Dead Revolver next!

I Hate The Internets Sometimes

This damn internet here at the National Hispanic University (don't ask). Or maybe this damn computer. Ah well, either way, I don't suppose it really matters that much. Can somebody tell me why an applet will run FINE for like an hour and a half, and then just arbitrarily decide not to work? Most annoying thing ever. I'm so pissed I'm making the wall vibrate from how hard I'm typing. FUCKER!

In other news, Tony Stark built this in a CAVE! With a BOX OF SCRAPS!

Still Alive

Been a while. Turned 17, almost got a shiney new girlfriend, then fucked that up. Uohh... am writing comics, kinda. Lessee, gotta be something that I can review... OU! I saw Kickass on Friday! It was, well, kickass. Very funny, but not in the way that you expect. Honestly, one of Nick Cage's best performances ever, but not his best. Certainly his... strangest. They basically copied the comic with different costumes for Hit-Girl, Big Daddy, and Red Mist, and let BD keep his supercop persona as the real one, but other than that, it was the comic. Oh, and Red Mist is... less evil, shall we say?

I think that Nick Cage only takes the best and worst roles offered to him as some kind of weird sociological experiment. I don't know what the aim of this experiment is, but by fuck, it exists. It's the only logical solution.

SHARKS WON, BITCH! COLORADO CAN SUCK MY BALLS!

Moved today. Not fun. I hate moving, but at least we're in the middle of everything. Only 5 minutes away from Barnes & Nobles and Camera 7. The only two places I ever go to anyway. Now I just need a job and a girl and I'll be set to go.

Also, somebody kill Rob Liefeld (still) and James Cameron (still), please.